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<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2>This is just too funny:</FONT></DIV>
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<P><FONT size=2>I never quite figured out why the sexual urges of men &
women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars
thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women their
heart. I have never figured out why the sexual desire gene gets thrown into a
state of turmoil, when it hears the words "I do". </FONT></P>
<P><FONT size=2>One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like
it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "What??????" </FONT></P>
<P><FONT size=2>So she says the words that every hubby on the planet dreads to
hear..."You must not be in tune with my emotional needs as a woman." I am
thinking, "What was her first clue?" I finally realized that nothing was going
to happen that night so I went to sleep. </FONT></P>
<P><FONT size=2>The very next day, we went shopping as a big, unnamed dept.
store....I walked around with her while she tried on 3 different very expensive
outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her to take all 3. She
wanted matching shoes, I said, "lets get a pair for each outfit" We went to the
jewelry dept. where she gets a pair of diamond earrings. </FONT></P>
<P><FONT size=2>Let me tell you....she was so excited. She must have thought I
was one</FONT> <BR><FONT size=2>wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think
she was testing me cause she</FONT> <BR><FONT size=2>asked for a tennis bracelet
when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I</FONT> <BR><FONT size=2>think I
threw her for a loop when I said it was ok. She was almost sexually
</FONT><BR><FONT size=2>excited from all of this. You should have seen her face
when, she said</FONT> <BR><FONT size=2>"I think this is all dear, lets go to the
cash register." </FONT><BR><FONT size=2> </FONT> <BR><FONT size=2>I could
hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like buying
all of this stuff now." You should have seen her face...it went completely
blank. I then said "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a
while." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me I added,
"You must not be in tune with my financial needs as a man." </FONT></P>
<P><FONT size=2>I figure that I won't be having sex again until sometime after
spring of 2008.</FONT> </P></DIV></BODY></HTML>