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<DIV><FONT size=2>I thought these were funny</FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT size=2>ben</FONT></DIV>
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<DIV>Snappy Answer No. 1<BR>A stewardess was stationed at the departure gate
to<BR>check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her<BR>hand for the
ticket, and he opened his coat and<BR>flashed her. Without missing a beat she
said, "Sir, I<BR>need to see your ticket, not your stub."<BR></DIV>
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<DIV>Snappy Answer No. 2<BR>THE TEACHER Snappy Answer OF THE YEAR</DIV>
<DIV><BR>A university lecturer reminds her students of<BR>tomorrow's final
exam.<BR>"Now, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being<BR>here tomorrow.
I might consider a nuclear attack or a<BR>serious personal injury or illness, or
a death in your<BR>immediate family but that's it, no other
excuses<BR>whatsoever!<BR>" A smart-arse bloke in the back of the room
raised<BR>his hand and asks, "What would you say if tomorrow I<BR>said I was
suffering from complete and utter sexual<BR>exhaustion?"<BR>The entire class
does its best to stifle their<BR>laughter. When silence is restored, the
lecturer<BR>smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her<BR>head, and
sweetly says, "Well, I suppose you'd have to<BR>write the exam with your other
hand."<BR></DIV></BODY></HTML>